cutting out traumatic memories

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i sit in a chair
in front of the mirror
as i'm shorn of the last strands grown out of my mind
signifiers of words tumbling down to the floor:

uniform, mess hall, discipline, obedience, responsibility, ambassador, pride, power, authority, hierarchy, bureaucracy, weapons, ballistics, strategy, efficiency, the contradiction of the value of life, allies, enemies, medical, negligence, spite, cowardice, malice, appreciation, rations, squads, lines, flags, reports, briefing, debriefing, pins, stripes, tags, bags, toys, and the seconds, minutes, hours and weeks of a life on pause while looking out the turret's window.

all empty certificates
shaken down and out,
itching and scratching,
but the shower afterwards blasts my scalp
with the cool sense of the weight of history...

unburdened.

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